Sunday, December 24, 2006

Santa's Pack

I was going to write someting modern and caustic about Santa Claus and his hairy sack full of guns and cocaine but, really, haven't we had enough trash-talk as a nation? TV is rife with gangsters tripping grannies attempting to cross the street; Republicans and Democrats are eating each other's flesh; everywhere liar's pants are on fire; knuckles and faces are colliding every which way ... and I say enough!

Everything will be positive on Bloggy-Blog from now on. I'm turning a new leaf, as the kid's say.

What's wrong with saying I love puppies in a basket? Furthermore, I'm not too ashamed to embrace the color yellow or skip merrily into lanes of on-coming traffic. I will even think of something positive to say about Oliver Stone, Barry Manilow, The Osmonds and processed cheese. They are all living things to be respected.

And so my smartypants sarcastic friends (especially you east Hollywood Myspace hipsters), I must depart from you. You will see me ascending into the sky and on to a higher calling. We will all be together, by and by.

Mandingo

3 comments:

Joey Polanski said...

I agree ...

... at least about Chrismas.

I long fer a rturn to a more wholsome time ...

... when Santa gave gifts, drank milk, ate cookies, n bangd classy dames like June Cleavr right aftr Wally n th Beav was excusd from th table.

Geritopia said...

exactly. if the majority of the population is in on the joke, then the foundation for great parody is ruined.

gee beav', on a counta' that it means that dad's laughing at the same stuff we are.

simple said...

I agree, processed cheese is one of the most important living things that doesn't get respect. I'm getting on that bus too. Thanks for your insight.